Archive for September, 2011
Fear is a useful tool. It allows us to know where our own personal limit is and keeps us safe. And it’s WHEN we know where our limits are, we can grow from there.
After graduating back in May 2010, I never realized how sheltered I was. School made it such a safe haven that we were all impervious to true failure in life. Everything we’ve done in school was “play time” and nothing was serious. Once it’s time to fly the coop, It hit me so hard that it’s difficult to find an illustration job out there. Interning at the Society of Illustrators made it even worst. It was like rubbing salt into an open womb looking at people my age and even younger made it to the world I want to be in while I was doing coat checks and serving them Hor’ Derves. I couldn’t bear with it and I ran. I ran out of fear. Fear of failure, fear that I won’t make it. That I am the table legs supporting up everyone else’s indulgent.
But sometimes you have to let go of your safety, or you will never explore new boundaries. It goes the same for an important rule I learned back in school: “Destroy your loved ones” – If you’re drawing something and you really fell in love with the head but the rest of the painting doesn’t fit, don’t try to hold onto that one little part that’s dear. Be able to completely erase it and draw it where it makes sense. the overall outcome will look so much better than a piece of candy sitting on top of a pile of shit.
After a year of running away and not posting anything. I think I’ve had enough, It’s time to turn around and face my fears. I can’t do this to my loyal followers who check back every so often this past year. seeing that there’s still views makes me so happy and sad that I haven’t represented myself the way I should. I’m better now. Lets move forward